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Saturday, May 19, 2018

Personal Thoughts, Stories & Reflections From People In Early Recovery: Part 2

stories early recoveryClient AJ 

When I came to Canyon Crossing I was angrier than I think than I have ever been. I was mad that I was in treatment and I was an alcoholic and drug addict. I was more scared than angry, that was the underlying emotion. I had many traumas which I had justified my use. I had just gotten out of an abusive relationship and was in the delusion that he was the love of my life. I was perfectly okay with going back to my abuser. After going to EMDR therapy and finally believing that I was worth more than I had received, I became a powerhouse in my own recovery and have fought for my life here. I have been here a while, however I am willing to go to any length to say sober. I thank everyday that I came to Canyon Crossing and I thank my higher power that the staff here has given me that love. Now believe that I am loved and that I am worth it.

Client A
PAIN

I am scared because of the feeling of you. I associate everything negative in my life as you being the root cause and I run from you. Feeling emotional pain hurts to the very core of my soul and feels like I will not be able to escape you.

I try to treat you as if you don’t exist and will not get to me by building up barriers in my relationships. When you are able to seep thru a crack in that wall I have tried to numb you out with food, alcohol, drugs, work (business) or relationships. In the end you are still there.

Therefore, I would like to be able to identify and express the emotions that eventually lead up to pain in a positive way. Because of you, I have been able to make positive changes in myself. I would like to know you in not such a destructive way, but instead, as an opportunity for growth. Walking thru pain is ultimately how I find true joy!

Client B 

I found a short poem a few weeks ago, and as a worrier and someone who lives in shame about my past, it really hit home. When that feeling gets severe, I’ve been turning to it…

ONE DAY AT A TIME 

There are two days in every week about which we should not worry; two days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension.

One of these days is YESTERDAY with its mistakes and cares, its faults and blunders, its aches and pains. Yesterday has passed forever beyond our control. All the money in the world cannot bring back yesterday. We cannot undo a single act we performed, we cannot erase a single word said—YESTERDAY IS GONE!

The other day we should not worry about is TOMORROW with its possible burdens, its large promise and poor performance. Tomorrow is also beyond out immediate control. Tomorrow’s sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds—but it will rise. Until it does we have no stake in tomorrow for it is yet unborn.

This leaves only one day—TODAY! Any man can fight the battle of just one day. It is only when you and I carry the burdens of those two awful eternities—YESTERDAY and TOMORROW—that we break down.

Client J

Just before Canyon Crossing Recovery I had settled into a life handicapped by a controlled substance that had taken away the things that meant most to me. My parents and family have always been my life and I had allowed myself to accept a new life without them. I always dreamed of having two or three kids close in age. After having my son, Subutex took that dream away from me and I had lied to myself believing I was fine in a life with only one child. The lies Subutex had me telling myself had me really thinking they were my own thoughts. I was content with a life that I would of said was a miserable life prior to this controlling substance. In recovery I was finally told something I truly wanted to know as true, that there is a happy healthy life without Subutex. There are no more lies. No more false contention. Only truth that I can have the life I’ve always wanted and the dreams I had can come back and be a reality.

Client K
My New Life 

I came to Prescott in February & started yet another treatment center at Viewpoint but due to changes, I came to Canyon Crossing. When I first heard the news that I was switching treatment centers, I was shocked & kind of scared but now that I am here at Canyon, I absolutely love it. I am so happy to be here surrounded by other girls that I feel truly care about me & my well being. I feel this helps me to have more motivation to move forward in my recovery & maintain my sobriety with support around me. My goal is to complete the program here at CCR & make myself & my parents proud. My parents have been surprisingly so supportive & caring throughout all this & I am beyond grateful for their support after all we have been through together.

Client R 
I Come From… 

I Come From Shakopee, Minnesota 
I Come From Peanut Butter Waffles 
I Come From You Are Pretty 
I Come From You Are Stupid 
I Come From Anything Pink With Ruffles 
I Come From In The Ocean 
I Come From The Dark Alone 
I Come From Staying Sober 
I Come From Pushing My Family Away 
I Come From 93 Days Clean 
I Come From Falling In Love 
I Come From My Grandfathers Dock In The Keys 
I Come From Just For Today 
I Come From My Scars 
I Come From My Tattoos 
I Come From In The Forest 
I Come From Promising Myself To Keep Working On Trusting 

Client T 

I WORK THESE STEPS 
THEY HELP 
IM LEARNING HOW TO LIVE 
THROUGH OPENESS AND SPIRIT IM LEARNING HOW TO GIVE 
SUCCESS IT COMES IN MANY FORMS 
SOMEDAYS I CANT BELIEVE 
WHAT LIFE HAS IN STORE FOR ME 
IM GLAD I DIDN’T LEAVE 
TODAY I TRULY LOVE MYSELF 
MORE AND MORE EACH DAY 
HEAD HELD HIGH 
I WALK THE LINE 
OF INTEGRITY AND GRACE

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