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Friday, May 11, 2018

Personal Thoughts, Stories & Reflections From People In Early Recovery

reflections early recovery
Client C

“Triggers”

Walking down the street
Minding my own business
Me and some white substance meet
It took me back to my past, the mess
My heart drops
I want to look back
Ignore the urge, just stop
I don’t want that sack
I’m 5 months clean
Don’t throw your life away
Time to adult not act like a teen
One step at a time all through the day.

- A recovering meth addict

Client H

I can only go up from here
Never looking back
I have learned how to hack
Life and all my fears.
I love myself
More than EVER
I can now face all of life’s endeavors.

Client J

Today I feel very emotional. I miss my old life. I have been thinking about my ex-husband and my family. I spoke to a fellow client about the way I was feeling and I feel so much better. Now the feeling of sadness has gone away. Relying on your friends and speaking about your problems releases your fears and worries. If I had not had this support I would have carried around the sadness for hours, beating myself up and worrying about my past. I am thankful for the clients at Canyon Crossing and the help they have given me.

Client K

I am currently working on my 4th Step and it is really opening my eyes to how miserable I made myself. I was so comfortable in my misery and thrived on the fact that I would never be better. Having that mindset gave me the excuse to drink the way that I did for so long. Being better meant me having to make a change, and change scared the hell out of me. Looking back on it, I think I was more terrified of change and of seeking help than I was of dying. Now that I am on the other side of it, my miserable nature is no longer beneficial to me. I found myself trying to sink back into misery and internally numbing myself last week and quickly snapped out of it. Nothing about living like that makes me feel good and I am so happy that I now have the awareness and the tools to get myself back on track.

Client K

Why? You put me down a path I thought I would never take A path I tried to steer away from You took my father there You took my grandmother there You took my cousin there Why? Why did you do this? Did you think it would make us stronger? Or did you think it would kill us? Why? What were you thinking? You stole my father You killed my grandmother You are making my cousin suffer You are worrying my mother and aunt Why? Why did you do this? Well guess what… It’s time Time for me to fight you Time for me to show you whose boss Surprised? Why? Did you think you could take me? You thought wrong I’m not falling into your trap Not today buddy So let me ask you Why did you think you could win?


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